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Quotes

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“I don’t get nightmares from horror movies, I get nightmares from waiting for Battle at the Berrics.”
—Willow

“Whales have penises?”
—Joey Brezinski

“If Yoda didn’t have Jedi powers, he’d be just like an old cat.”
—Reda

“This was just … words. Lots and lots of unrelated words.”
—From “Russellmania’s” review of Dave Carnie’s boob on Amazon.com

“Sleep is the cousin of awesome. Whoever said it’s the cousin of death is a dick head.”
—Jamal Smith

“The last thing I remember is this Jelly Belly stand then I wake up in jail. Big Bear = lame.”
—Jake Brown

“I have a vast knowledge of all this weird gay shit.”
—Bill Weiss

“I could hoop this in two seconds.”
—-Fabian Alomar regarding a dinner knife on a restaurant table


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